I hate that.
I remember a conversation which occurred about six months ago, when a very dear friend of mine had expressed a distinct and compelling urge to impale himself bodily upon his computer. He was in the thick of the end-of-semester angstbugs, having something like five million billion papers to write and relative analysis of Gravity's Rainbow as interpreted by the Mexican Gila monster to complete. He'd often received the more cynical end of my merciless taunting because he was an English major, and I often neglected the fact that he doubled it up masochistically with psychology just so that I could tease him about it and make myself feel better, as a math major, about the fact that the only friends I have are derivative.
Ha, ha.
Anyway, all this culminated into me pointing and laughing at him because I didn't have to write stuff very often and he did. A lot. The end of the semester was apparently very difficult because the last thing he wanted to do was write. He wanted to do fun stuff like play guitar and come get drunk at my apartment. (This did happen, but much later.)
Now, we're in November, and as I still have about two months before I start on the classes I really need for my degree, I decided to do something "enriching" and "creative," two words which when applied to me are usually utilised to describe baking flour or swearing, respectively.
I'm pretty sure there will be blood.
It follows that the way I typically avoid writing something is to write about my complaints about writing something, which is hilarious if you think about it. So that's what this blog post is about. I signed up for National Novel Writing Month only to hit about 6,500 words and go "halp." The way it happened in 2006 was, I did about 25,000 words up to the last week of November, whereafter I failed entirely as a human being and spent the following four days locked in my room, subsisting off Macaroni Grill chianti, cheddar cheese, and my own self-loathing until I hit 50,015 words by 11:58pm on November 30th.
But look! I got a prize!
It was completely ridiculous.
I worry about myself.
You win Nano! :D
ReplyDeleteAnd you know, I'm doing the same thing. I have to write an economics paper, due like maybe tomorrow, and I'm finding it near impossible to keep it from turning into a history report because history is cool, yo, and you can't just write about WWII's economy in America without also writing about it's economic causes and effects elsewhere, and also leading up to it, both in America and elsewhere, and there were so MANY things that contributed to WWII breaking out, and they all happened at once or in close succession, but you can't write about everything all at once or it would look like this: The Germany got Austria all up in China's grill in 1918, the Nazi party was a foothold in Manchuria, when the Japanese Mussolini assimilated the Treaty of Versailles, then 1929 happened, and fascist Italy was Chancellor in 1933, restored to a happier, more carefree Great Depression catalyzed Europe, but was still reeling from Hitler's charisma, and people died.
No, you have to write about things one by one, but then it sounds stupid and not at all concurrent, like this: WWI happened, leaving America happy, prosperous, and confident, while the rest of the world floundered tumultuously. Herbert Hoover traveled the world, trying to befriend other nations, but the stage had been set for another global conflict as early as the tail end of the first global conflict. Nazis happened in 1919, Germany was reeling from WWI and it's war debts, on top of the "war guilt" of the Treaty of Versailles, Japen was getting all up in China's grill by setting up a foothold in Manchuria, eventually attacking deep within China, but that comes later. First, the Great Depression happened, and it spilled into Europe, making Germany even more emo until Hitler rose in power by saying, "Don't kill yourself, Germany; kill everyone else!" Also, Mussolini took over Italy, and Germany assimilated Austria, and the League of Nations sat around picking their noses over it. Then WWII happened, partly because of the Great Depression, but also because of all that other stuff. And more stuff I didn't mention.
See, that's retarded, and there's no way to organize it into a non-retarded series of simultaneous events.
And instead of writing my paper, I'm complaining about writing my paper.
- ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (guess who biotch!)
Why am I up this late? I don't know. I think it's mostly because NyQuil is doing a really shitty job, but also partially due to the fact that I slept until 3pm yesterday and even more slightly attributed to the fact that the family's laptop is still screwed up and I said I'd fix it days ago. (Of course, feeling like I'm being repeatedly run over by a tank is my primary excuse for not doing so.)
ReplyDeleteAnyway, am I a bad person for really liking the concept of a history paper? What kind of a class is this, anyway, where you can't write the history of a country's economy when the subject is ECONOMIC HISTORY? (Although I can commiserate; remember when I had to change my ridiculously precise English paper topic because my professor didn't think it was precise enough? LAME.)
Personally, I think you should change the entire project into a soap opera dedicated to the nose-picking League of Nations, Thug!Japan, and emo Germany. And then have the U.S. come in, but only when you need a character that doesn't really want to commit to a relationship but is good at fucking people.
By the way, I'm failing ridiculously at NaNo.
Hope to see you around soon!